Batman inspires me to make some changes in my life

I went to see Batman Begins tonight and realized what I love about superheroes. In both this movie and the first Spider-Man one, you get to see the hero make his own costume. That's hot! It's like, not only does this guy have impressive fighting abilities, he is willing to get crafty. That's my dream boy. He'd always keep me safe, and on quiet nights we could sit home and knit. (I'd work on my knitted skirt, and he could knit a new costume.)

Although actually, while watching the movie, I wasn't so much thinking that I wanted to date a superhero. I'd rather be one. I mean, I already know how to knit and sew. I have a hot glue gun, all kinds of supplies, and lots of paint. Now all I need are some battle skills. During the extended training sequences at the start of Batman Begins, I kept getting distracted. Instead of concentrating on Bruce Wayne's character development, I was sitting there thinking, "I wonder if the martial arts place on Lankershim is any good... I wonder how much lessons are." This movie is like a giant ad for anything ninja-related.

SUPERHERO CHECKLIST:

Come up with a name. Bruce Wayne seems to think I should embrace my fears. "Dying Alone Girl"? No, that's way too Bridget-Jonesy. And it doesn't have a good symbol. Maybe something environmental? The "Climate Change Lady"? No, that's lame. Lonely Girl! That kinda makes me laugh. I could help people who spend too much time alone in their apartments.

Learn some martial arts. I know this is key, but I'm not really sure how it'll come into play if I'm only helping lonely people. Maybe I will have to also keep them safe. In any case, I need to be prepared.

Make a costume. Once I'm done with my knitted skirt, this will be next on the list. Or maybe the knitted skirt could be part of the costume, so I'll already have a head start. I need to come up with a symbol to wear on my chest. And I should find some bulletproof yarn, just in case.

Get a car. Lonely Girl probably won't be able to fly. Flying seems kind of lonely anyway... all that time up in the sky by yourself. She needs a car though. (There's no way a superhero is going to stand on the corner waiting for a bus that only comes once an hour.) Maybe traffic is her one weakness. She knows she should hate it, but secretly, she likes being around all those other people.

I probably won't ever mention this checklist again, since it's about my secret identity. But if you ever get lonely, just shine my symbol on a cloud. (Dammit, I've got to figure out a symbol!)